Sports for Gay People

17th February 2014

After discovering today that gay people have no interest in sport (reference), I decided to do some research.

. . . Obviously, there are sports that gays like, and I decided to share my findings here.

Table Tennis
Gays have weaker wrists, which is why they can't play tennis properly. Luckily, gays can still enjoy a 'lighter' version of tennis - table tennis.
If you're looking to buy a gay a present this year, then perhaps a set of table tennis paddles and ping pong balls would be right up his alley.

Robert Redford and Paul Newman enjoy a game of table tennis during the filming of Butch Cassidy And The Sundance Kid
They like rugby!!!!
Who would have thought the gays like the sweaty closeness of a manly game like rubgy? Not me. And I guess Neil Francis wouldn't have guessed it either! There's actually a gay inclusive rugby club, based in Dublin, Ireland. They call themselves the Emerald Warriors, and you can visit their site here.
There's a gay rugby tournament

As if that wasn't surprising enough, the Bingham Cup is a biennial international gay rubgy tournament. Who would've thought there are enough gays to hold a whole international competition!

Now might be a good time to watch;
Running
Most gays are not built with broad shoulders. They would be no good in a fight. This is why you never see gays doing any of the combat sports. They avoid physical fights. It is for this exact reason that gays get so much practice at running. Gay children are bullied in school, so adult gays have years more experience at running than normal people. Gays are especially good at sprinting.
Ice-Skating
It is well known that most, but not all male ice-skaters are gay. The Russians are keeping a closer eye on happenings at the figure skating competitions more than any other sports in The Winter Olympics in Sochi. Gays love sparkles and sequins, which is why they enjoy ice-skating more than any other winter sport. Ice-skating actually is more suitable for gays than straight people, because of the twirls and other girly moves.

Jason Brown of the United States competing in Sochi.

Are there any more games or sports that gay like? Let me know if I've left any out in the comments below.

[/sarcasm] [/satire]

by Dorcas Réamonn

Hi, I'm Dorcas. I make websites. I lecture in Digital Marketing and related stuff in the UCD Smurfit School. I do consultancy. I do talks. I've written a book on WordPress (available here).